Internal Family Systems
Internal Family Systems is a collaborative, non-pathologizing, evidenced-based approach that offers an empowering view of our internal worlds to create lasting emotional change. Over the past several years I have studied and practiced IFS both personally and professionally. I have felt and seen the profound healing qualities it offers and feel honored to share it with those I work with.
As humans we are hardwired to carry many thoughts and feelings that make up our unique personalities. From birth these aspects of ourselves become impacted by the world around us. Personal experiences, family dynamics, trauma, relationships, biology, family lineage, cultures (to name a few) are influences that shape how we see and react to our inner and outer worlds. In IFS you learn how to relate to these different aspects of your personality (otherwise known as "parts") to gain insight, deepen awareness and heal places inside yourself where initial wounding occurred.
What are "parts"?
Parts are aspects of our personalities that have learned to navigate life in various ways. You are familiar with these, and probably speak about different parts of yourself without even realizing it. In IFS parts are categorized into two main groups: protectors and exiles.
Protectors
Protectors are parts of ourselves that work to shield us from getting hurt or feeling pain from the past. Based on life experiences, these parts can sometimes become extreme in the way they protect, unintentionally creating more conflicts in life and leading to more hardships. To better understand protectors, they are grouped into two categories: managers and firefighters.
Managers
Manages are parts of our personality that show up in our daily lives to prevent old pain from resurfacing and prevent further pain from happening. These parts of us can be great resources in life, often being strategic, organized, rational, care-taking, or reasonable. Common manager parts are: the Planner, the Inner-Critic, the Judger, the Care-Giver, the Nurturer, the Learner, the Teacher, the Achiever, the Performer, the worrier, the friend, the good boy/girl, etc.
Firefighters
Firefighters are the parts of us that react to emotional pain when it is present by actively trying to put it out. They are like an internal emergency operating system. They can be impulsive, reactive, fierce, non-rational and unrelenting. Firefighter parts are well-intentioned but typically do not seem so. When in their extreme state they can cause a lot of destruction. Examples of firefighter parts are: The Addict (sex, drugs, alcohol), Rage, the Fighter, the Gambler, the Cutter/Self-Harmer, the Suicidal One, the Obsessive-Compulsive one, the Eating Disorder, etc.
What IFS offers is a chance to mindfully and compassionately build an understanding relationship to all of our inner protectors. This not only can lead us to where there is emotional pain that needs tending to, but also helps us NOT get overwhelmed by the extreme nature of our hard-working protectors. As you begin to develop a new relationship to these aspects of yourself, you are freed up to respond to your internal and external world with more clarity, courage and compassion.
Exiles
Exiles are our most vulnerable parts. They typically live in the unconscious areas (otherwise known as the Limbic system) of
our brain. The reason for this is they often carry intense emotional pain, such as anxiety, sadness, terror, fear, or despair that can feel overwhelming when it meets the surface of conscious awareness. Because their pain can be extreme, protectors work to keep them from entering the conscious mind in effort to function in daily life. When exiles show up, the individual often feels overwhelmed by the intensity of these feelings. Exiles are typically wounded in childhood or times of trauma.
Self
While we all have numerous parts, fortunately we are not just a collection of these parts. We are so much more than that. Our truest Self is the center of our being, and has the capacity to heal, understand and integrate these aspects of our personalities. I like to call this our authentic Self and it is from this place that transformation is possible.
When parts are not extreme or hijacking us, we have access to our core Self. In Self we often feel grounded, centered, calm, clear, courageous, compassionate, accepting and open. We can use this energy to turn towards all parts of ourselves, relieve them from their burdens and restore them to their healthy nature.
Self is spacious an able to hold feelings/memories/thoughts that show up inside us without getting damaged. I often relate it to the sky. The sky is always its essential Self. Even when an ice storm, hurricane, or thunderstorm come through, it is always there to hold the weather without getting lost or damaged. This space exists in all of us and IFS gives us a way to discover and embody it. When we are in Self we can make meaningful connections, choices, and actions that bring healing, purpose and fulfillment to our lives.
Relevant Professional Trainings
IFS Level 1: Lead Trainer, Pam Krause
IFS Level 2: Deepening and Expanding, Lead Trainer, Kay Gardener
IFS Level 3: Lead Trainer/Founder of IFS, Dick Schwartz
2- Day Intensive Treating Complex Trauma with Internal Family Systems: A comprehensive certificate training course, Trainer: Frank Anderson
Introduction to IFS (2-day intensive training): Trainer/Founder of IFS, Dick Schwartz
2-Day Intensive IFS and Trauma Recovery: Trainer/Founder of IFS, Dick Schwartz
The Self as Therapist: Trainer/Founder of IFS, Dick Schwartz
I am a Certified IFS Therapist